whole heartedly.

i am obsessed with my child.

when she is awake, i will do anything to make her smile. or coo. her noises are so sweet and angelic. it is heaven to me.

when she sleeps, i stare at her, smiling, and sometimes crying, because i literally love her so much that it makes me so happy but also so scared.

when she naps, which she is actually doing from time to time now, i blog about her. and edit pictures of her. and make videos.

i am that mother. oh well. riley- you are sooo worth it girl.

happy three months my little girl. you are, without a doubt, the best thing i have ever done.

2 weeks.

our little love turned 2 weeks old yesterday.

my mom baby sat and scotty and i went to a 530 dinner reservation at gjelina. it was nice to get out of the house. and there is no one i would rather have watch riley than my momma.

what have i learned in two weeks little girl?

well... i have a new depth to my ability to love. i love you so much it makes me cry... i cry all of the time (good tears). you are currently strapped to my chest with the ergo- and i find my spare hand holding you even closer. i cant listen to pretty songs anymore. ones about love, family, or home are off limits... they make me too overwhelmed with love and i drown myself in tears. i can survive on no sleep (so far). i can sit and stare at you for the whole day. you change every day, maybe even every hour, and i dont want to miss a second with you. i love your daddy more than i thought i could. little riley, you have already made me better. a better wife, a better and more appreciative daughter, (and a more reclusive friend, but im sure that will pass), and you of course made me a momma. thanks little angel.

heres a bit of your second week with us:

wedding!

hi,

scotty and i are almost one month away from our one year anniversary. crazy. we also just got our wedding pics. i spent the morning at work going through every single one slowly- huge smile on my face. it really was the greatest day ever. the pictures make me so so happy.

maybe next time i am whining at scott about a bug in the bathroom or taking out the trash, i will look up and see one of these pics and smile instead. probably not... but what a day it was!

thanks scott. for giving me the most beautiful courtship. the most perfect proposal. the most patient partner while wedding planning. and a great first year. not perfect, but truly great! im so so lucky! we have so much to look forward to. its ridiculous.

like we said in our vows... you are my heart, my love, my future and my home. i am honored to call you my partner.

so heres some pics. mostly just to make me happy.

just a few...

Well...

its been a while.

dear diary,

i am still looking for a job (but i have gotten to spend time with my other man- grayson!).

our house is still a work in progress. i still love our little house.

my hair is literally the color of dirty toilet water. not cute.

our little puppy, huntley, is still sweet and completely unmanageable.

we are joining a country club (barf).

i have gained 8 lbs since the wedding.

it is already february?

marriage is hard work, but it really is the best thing ever.

i have been working as a temp receptionist for too long (where all i do is read "modern love" and then when i am done with that, i read blogs that i love that have cool things featured. so i have a ton of wants (not a single need in the bunch). here are some:

i need this moment in my brain bank filed under "do this a lot":

i want to have a succulent garden. because they are beautiful, and more importantly, i cannot kill them:
i LOVE this. my bedroom ideas are conflicting and very different and there are a lot of them. this could be a problem because we have a one bedroom.
and this one. i think i love this one more:

i want a nook... i want this nook:

i swear i would get a lot of "work" done if i had a corner like this:
when we have our baby, i am going to make this it's habitat. or in the mean time, maybe i will make this the puppys habitat. i neeeed this. i know i said there were no needs but i really do... especially once we have a baby. hahah

and then when babu grows up... what? this could totally be a boys room:

ugh i would not get a lot done if this existed in my house. but life cant be all about work, so i want to create this too:
our backyard needs love... this screams LOVE:

other than that life is pretty good. lots to look forward to.

highlights:

grayson said i love you leesha (thats me)

scotty built us a new fence... or started to... pics to come

annie is totally showing! so fun! and i am visiting oly in march.

i have three interviews next week.

i have lost three pounds. 250049228371246147124 to go.

scotty is sending me to new orleans to see my gaycee. (!!!!)

we have a black tie affair this weekend- always a good time!

it is sunny is california!

we have gas again. not to be crass- but fuck you edison.

my family is healthy and they know that i love them!

Honeymoon

HONEYMOON-

We just returned from our most wonderful wonderful honeymoon.

Mykonos has some of the most beautiful beaches and clearest water that I have ever seen, and the most interesting old town. It isnt a movie set or set up as a prop or a schtick it is the Old Town, still operating as a bustling place. It is overwhelmed by tourism- but that is just a sign of the times. Aside from focusing on the junk in all of the stores, we waked the winding roads, getting lost, appreciating that there are still gems like this on our planet. And the food is soooo yummy, and wine and beer is cheaper than water...

oh, and I got a ghetto gold Daytona Rolex knock off for 50 Euro... whatever. It was FUN.

Here is a peek of our set up:

Santorini is truly one of my most favorite places in the world. It was total paradise and the only thing I didnt like about it was the one morning that I woke up after three bottles of Santorini's famous Boutari wine. Other than that- Bliss. Capitol B. I want to go back, like yesterday... Being there made me really wish we werent tied down by *jobs* and anxiety and responsibility (*yes, I am aware I do not currently have a job... but the idea of it... the one I am GOING to get... first thing Monday morning).

It is so easy to get caught up in day to day life... TV, gossip magazines, fretting over napkin colors, weight, money, clothes, zits, etc... but every time I travel, and catch the "bug", I really do come back with a much better perspective on life, and what matters. Americans are seen as so uptight and high strung and money obsessed and work obsessed. I would not really describe myself as these things- but in Greece, people were constantly laughing and joking and playfully teasing and talking loud, and over eating, and drinking and kissing children and understanding and appreciating their dependence on one another, and the land, and the sea... it was inspiring. So, I am NOT going to make it a goal to be louder, or kiss Grayson more or eat or drink more (Ithink I do all of those things more than I should already) but... I am going to make a conscious effort to get my priorities a bit more where I would like them.

At this moment in time the things that matters to me most are:

-my new role, as wife. being the best person I can be for myself, him, and everyone we come into contact with.

-my family. and my new family. we are the luckiest people to have them. making them aware every single day of how much I love and appreciate them.

-getting outside of our bubble more often. truly considering what others experience in day to day life. remembering that there is SO much more than crossword puzzles and the hot new restaurant.

-finding my creative outlet again, and again, and again.

-being a good aunt, daughter, sister, friend, and granddaughter.

-making travel a priority. making saving a priority. not for a rainy day- but for sunny days so we can enjoy our super blessed life to the fullest!

-finding a job that makes me feel happy on monday mornings while also helping me to take strain off of my very patient husband.

-keeping in better touch with those that I love.

At this moment in time and in the future I am going to appreciate the things that matter most to me a lot more and keep them at the top of my totem pole.

HITCHED

it was magic. i am the luckiest girl in the world.

bubbles

i not only love to drink bubbles. i love to sit in them too. when he and i first met, we would "meet in the middle" and have a rendezvous in hotel bathtubs. and then we would also go to dinner and talk and other things. i dont mean to sound like a floozy.

he used to pack bubble bath into his carry on. i want this to be me and him. heaven.

shot by the very talented megan w